We're All Doomed
by Sparadoof
Summary: ZADR. Fairy-tale land thing. Why did Zim have to drag him into this 'experimental' mess? Will they even ever be able to finish it?
1. Chapter 1

**(A/N:) I've been wanting to do something like this for a while, but you know, the whole 'lazy' thing gets in my way.**

**And I should probably be working on my other story but…eh.**

**Made up the fairy-tale thing. 8D**

**And sorry for the first chapter being so short, I promise I'll write more later on, just had to get it going first! D:  
**

**Oh yeah, and future ZaDR. **

**Just sayin'.**

**Chapter 1**

It was a dark and stormy night, and Dib was sneaking into Zim's base _yet again. _

"Gaz, I'm in the room right next to the main branch of the base! I'm really going to blow it up this time!" He whispered into the communication device, which was disguised as a watch, on his wrist. '_I just hope he isn't home tonight_' he thought before glancing around nervously.

His mind raced through all the directions to get to the spot that he wanted to be in. '_just climb up here, and take a left…where's that platform? Oh, there it is I see now. Climb this pole and… AHA!_' There was the final obstacle. Another pole, then he'd have to climb on some wires onto the large platform above him. No problem.

He latched his arms together, seemingly hugging the pole, and then kicked his feet off of where he was standing to get some distance. Repeating this task, he had finally made it to the wires under the large platform overhead. Dib placed his right hand on one of the many wires, his other hand soon following. His legs hugged the large pole underneath.

'_Don't look down. Don't look down. Don't look down._' Repeated in his head, as he swung one leg up, and then dug it in between two of the wires, a green one, and a blue one. '_Okay, one leg up, now just have to get the other,_' he swung the other leg up, repeating the task he had earlier done, '_and, now I have to get to the platform._'

Dib was now hanging, who knows how high above the ground, onto the small, metallic wires that he prayed would not break. He let his right hand free from the wires; brought it farther ahead of him, and then grabbed the wires farther ahead.

'_Still safe._" he sighed, bringing his left foot up, then latching it between two more wires. He repeated this with his opposite hand and foot, then again with the same until he reached the platform.

He brought his hands up above him, latching onto the platform then pulled himself up. The first thing he saw, was not what he wanted to see.

"WHATCHU DOIN' BIG-HEADED BOY?" The dysfunctional robot screamed at him. Oh, how he _despised_ this robot so much right now. "Shh, GIR! Lets play the quiet game. Whoever wins gets a taco!" Dib whispered in reply. Oh he hoped this worked, because if it didn't, the consequences would _not_ be pretty. To his luck, the robot nodded, as if he understood for once.

After the robot had walked (or rather, bounced) away, he started towards the center of the base again. Once he was a few feet away, he took a short look behind him, quickly checking to see if Zim was there, then turned forward again.

"Just what do you think you're doing, foul earth-beast?"

Oh _crap_.

"Uhh… exploring the base in better hope that I may be able to—" he cut himself off as Zim glared, approaching him slowly.

"I was actually hoping you would show up, Dib-stink, you see; I have this new _experiment_ that I need you to assist me in testing. I do so think you would be interested in it, as I too am going to join in." the green-skinned boy said, glare not once wavering.

Dib glanced to his side, sweat droplets starting to form around the top of his head, as he looked for a way out.

"Looking for an escape? There isn't one. Well, not up here, anyways. It's the center of the base, even one as stupid as you should be able to figure out that there wouldn't be an easy escape from here if anybody ever tried something?" Zim was now at least half a foot away from Dib.

Something wasn't right. Zim seemed much more…rational than he usually is. The calm glare and steady, almost monotonous voice making the short alien seem more diabolical than usual. He barely had time to think before Zim extracted the spider legs from his Pak, and pinned him to the machine behind where Dib was standing.

"You will assist me, earth-filth, as nobody else can. I will be joining you soon enough." He said, placing a small device on top of Dib's head, then his own. Zim brought out a small vile, then a syringe with foreign lettering printed along the sides. "Are you aware of the human stories proclaimed as the fictional 'fairy-tales'? This device is supposed to simulate a fairy-tale in your dreams, and you will be unable to wake up until the fairy-tale has ended. I created it in hopes of learning more of the human culture, but since we Irkens are on a much higher level than you human-beasts, I needed a human experiment to test it as well as myself." The long reply came, as he sucked the vile into the syringe, then poked it into Dib's arm.

"As a plus, I get to experience it on a far more advanced level than you humans do, so be glad, Dib-thing." He said, as the liquid went into the dark-haired boy's arm, causing his vision to blur as his body was over-taken with drowsiness. Soon, his vision faded out, as he was in a deep sleep.

Zim blinked at the sleeping boy, and then brought him into his arms. '_The Dib-beast even smells of filth._' He thought, wrinkling his nose, as he used his spider-like legs to slide down the pole, Dib had just climbed before, and carried him into a lab branch that had many hospital-like beds strung around it.

He placed Dib on the nearest bed to the door, and then laid himself in the best farthest from it. "Pak, activate sleep-mode." A small 'whirrring' sound was heard, before the lights on the Pak dulled into a gray-pink color, and Zim closed his eyes. The real world faded out, as he entered the realm of sleep.

"Your highness, may I offer you a drink, or perhaps, something to eat?"

Zim blinked at the sudden change in scenery. He appeared to be sitting on a large golden throne, with lion fur strewn along the top. There was a large red carpet that led to where he was sitting, and flags hung along the sides of the large building he was in.

"No, Zim does not wish for anything at the moment. Now be gone with you." He finally replied to the overly-dressed man in front of him. '_Where is the Dib-Human?' _He thought, still trying to adjust completely to the scenery around him. "Wait a moment, human-filth," He called to the man, "Where may I find the, er, information-human at this time?" The man gave him a confused look, before pointing down a long hallway, "He's down there, second door on the right." Zim nodded, "Okay, now away with you human-filth!"

Dib's vision was slowly creeping back to him, as he took a look around the room he was now in. There was a small shelf-like... thing on the wall, with two small jars on it. The roof appeared to be made out of branches and hay, same as the walls. Taking a look down, he noticed there was a dirt floor, and no carpeting, or anything.

"Diiiiiib! Get out of the house _now_, and come help your father gather wood to fix the roof with!" a strange woman yelled from outside the small hut-house thing. He wasn't sure on what to do, so he listened to the woman. When he got up, he noticed the clothing he was in. A different assortment of furs covered most of his body, with long cotton-like sleeves reaching down his arms. A brown leather made a vest over the furs, with a belt-like appendage hanging from the side, and on his feet were large, black boots.

So he must be a peasant?

_Nice_.

Just _wonderful_.

Guess this means he becomes the hero later on too? Sweet, but where was Zim?

he didn't have too much time to think on it before the woman called for him again, "Dib? Get out here, right now!"

"Information-human, I demand you tell me of the Dib-human's whereabouts." Zim said, glaring at the man in front of him. "Dib? the lowly peasant boy? He's in the part of the village just beyond the river. Why do you ask for such a lowly boy's whereabouts?" The man replied, nonchalantly. "That is not of your concern, stink-beast."

Zim marched back towards the room from which he had came from, slamming the door behind him. He entered the room with the thrown made of gold, and sat, legs sprawled across the arm of the large chair, his back leaned on the other arm.

The first thing he had noticed was that he was taller here, than in the real world. He had grown, maybe 2 or 3 feet, he guessed to fit the role he played here. The second thing he had noticed was the clothing change. He had a long cape, that reached to the back of his knees, and a crown made of gold, such as the chair had been. Jewels decorated the crown, and the suit he wore. He had a blue, long sleeved, baggy shirt, with flaps on the top of the sleeves that had some fancy, gold design on them. A vest of silver covered his chest, and the tops of his legs, the rest of his legs covered with the same blue material that his shirt had. His boots were also silver, and had the same gold design as the shirt flaps put into them. A belt bore across his waist, with what the humans call a 'sword' placed in it's holder.

Zim wasn't impressed by it, but it was measly human designs, so what more could he expect? The added height was nice, though.

Zim sulked in the chair when a realization finally hit him. The Dib-beast was a lowly human peasant, and earlier he had been called 'your highness.'

Which means he was a king, right?

He paused for a second, blinking at the ceiling before he burst into laughter. he was a king, and Dib-stink was a peasant!

**x-x**


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N:) So, here's the second chapter.**

**Sorry, I know I should work on short-lived life but this one seems much more…fun to work with.**

**So I will most definitely work on ^ later. 8D**

**Chapter 2**

Dib walked outside to meet the woman he guessed was him "mom." She has long brown hair, and green eyes.

"You need to help your father! He's out in the forest that way." She said, pointing at a large forest to the right of the hut-house. "He hasn't gone too far, so it should be easy to find him. Dib nodded in reply, and then headed towards where his "father" was supposed to be.

Once he reached the forest, he took a small path to look around for any signs of human life, other than his, in hopes that he would just be able to get this over with. He didn't get very far before he heard crackling noises coming from a small trail that led off the path.

He took the small trail until he came across a man who looked as if he were made of muscles. "Er, hello?" He called out, hoping he had the right guy. "Ah, hello son! I see you have finally come to assist me in gathering branches and wood to rebuild the house!" The man called out at him. '_God, I hope I don't have to be around these people much longer. This is extremely awkward._' Dib thought to himself, as he approached the man, who was much, _much_ more built than he was.

"What would you like me to do?" Dib asked, hoping it was an easy task. The man took a look behind himself, and nodded towards a pile of wood. "Take that pile to the house. I'll go gather some more branches."

This man's extreme happy boastfulness was a _horrific_ thing to have to sit and watch.

Dib walked to the rather large pile of branches, and took as much wood as he could into his arms. The bark from the branches easily cut through his cotton-like shirt causing it to scrape against his arms.

_Great_.

So he could _feel pain_?

He trudged on towards the house, taking note of the landmarks and paths so he could remember his way back. Once he had finally reached the house, he set the part of the pile he had gathered down, and turned to head back into the woods.

"Where do you think you're going, young man?" He heard the voice of the woman from behind him.

"Uhh, to help carry the rest of the pile?" He simply replied. This woman was seriously getting annoying.

"Without putting the branches on the roof? I thought I taught you better than that." She said, glowering at him. "You put these on the house, you can go and help your father, understand me?" She scolded.

"Yeah, okay."

**xx**

Zim continued in the position he had taken before, laughing loudly and staring at the ceiling, until his antennae picked up sounds coming from outside of the large door at the front of the room.

"…yeah, I heard that…peasants were going to…king's thrown.." He heard the (he was assuming) smaller man's voice come out nervously.

"You're kidding, they couldn't even if they tried." He heard a booming voice follow, obviously at an attempt of keeping quiet.

Zim sat trying to put the puzzle together.

Peasants, king's thrown, and couldn't even if they tried. Were they going to try and overrun him? Nah, of course not, he was their beloved king! The king who, in most ancient Irken stories was equivalent to the same status the Tallest were to him. Besides, he's got the trained army, being a powerful leader and all.

After a while of hearing the men chat about useless information, Zim's curiosity had risen, and he started walking towards the door. "Hello, men. Zim would like to know what you were speaking of earlier when you said, oh, what was it, they couldn't even if they tried, and king's thrown? Tell Zim, now, pitiful earth ffffilth!" The men stared at him in disbelief, when the smaller man of the two boomed, "Yes, o-of course your highness!"

Oh, so _that_ was the booming voice he'd heard.

"The peasants have started a rebellion, and are planning to attack sometime soon. But, your highness, they are mere peasants, they are of no harm! They are weak and pitiful!"

Zim glared at the man, before turning back to the oversized chair. "Double the human-patrol units and human-watch units. Do not let any peasant into the kingdom, unless Zim gives you permission. The only weak human-filth allowed into the kingdom is a young worm with an oversized head and a scythe poking out from it."

"Yes, of course!" the man said quickly before walking away.

'_So I play the role of the evil king? That is fine, but Zim will not be killed that easily._' He thought, while walking towards a place where two large flags hung from the ceiling side by side. A large rope hung from the center of the two flags. Zim stared at it, observing all of this, before wrapping his hands around the rope, and pulling as he had seen the humans do in the movies GIR often liked to watch. Although Zim would never admit it, the sight that greeted him was beautiful. A full moon reflected off of an almost completely clear lake. Zim stared mindlessly for a moment before regaining composure.

'_It's water, Zim, the filthy Earth substance._' He told himself.

Before long, he found himself walking outside, and towards the large lake. Once he was out there, he took a few deep breaths and submerged himself in the sight. A cool breeze lightly blew on the top of his back…

Wait.

'_That can't possibly be right._' He thought before reaching his hang back to feel for his beloved Pak.

And surely enough, it wasn't there. Zim walked out to the human resource to see if anything else had changed in the reflection it emitted. His antennae were still there, and his skin was still green, but something was off…

_His eyes._

They looked life the contacts that he wore when he was around the humans. And there was some strange fuzzy line above his eyes. The human eyebrows…?

After discovering how different he looked here, it took him a moment before he realized his hands were being trickled over with something cool. He looked down, and discovered that it was the human water. Shock rushed over him, before he calmly lifted himself up, turned around, and started screaming.

Zim flailed his arms about, still screaming about the water "draining his life juices" before he ran to the room with the oversized chair, and curled up at the back of the 'royal thrown.'

"Stupid human _eyebrows_, and _water_, and _eyes_, and… _water_." He mumbled to himself, shock still imminent from the previous encounter.

Once he calmed down, he realized just how tired he was. He strolled to the front of the room, dragging his feet along, as he took towards the long hallway in front of him. '_Finding the human sleep-room is not going to be an easy task._' He thought. Finding his way outside had been easy, because he had just walked down the hall, and took the door out of the small lobby placed there.

A while passed of looking into each room for a human-bed before he finally decided to ask one of the human-beasts for…assistance. He looked down the left corridor split, seeing, to his luck, a human droid.

"Zim demands that you lead him to the room for sleep." The droid gave him a confused look, before leading him towards a door the looked simpler than all the rest in the building, which he had just realized was rather large. He opened the door, and inside was a large room, with a large human sleeping device in the middle.

"Zim no longer requires your assistance." He said, walking towards the bed.

The blankets that covered it were huge and soft, and they were all red and pink. The human service droid hummed, then closed the door, leaving his king to sleep peacefully.

**xx**

The rest of Dib's day continued as it had before, his "mother" nagging him about sticks and branches, and his "father" being the mega-man he is.

Once the sun had set and the moon was up, he was finally called into the hut-house to rest. He took a few more looks around and turned to the woman, "So…what are we having to eat?" His "mother" gave him an odd look before saying, "We don't have the money for food, Dib. I thought you knew that? The king here is cruel, and gives up\s little to no pay. That's how it's been for years." Dib nodded, understanding, before asking, "Who's the king?"

He received another crazed look before she replied, "King Zim? How do you _not_ know of that name? Are you sick with something?" She asked, worry evident in her voice. Oh yeah, _now_ she's concerned.

King Zim…? No way.

Oh _hell_ no.

"Mother, do we have a horse that I may ride tonight? I am going to, er…visit the king." His voice was so innocent, it was creepy. "Only to beg that he raise our pay. Maybe he will listen to me, since I am a mere child."

The woman shook her head. "We have Betsy. She is only a donkey. If you really wish as if you must go, you can, but the king is cruel. Be careful."

Dib smiled in response, then headed out of the hut. '_Donkey…donkey…where's the stupid thing?_' He internally asked himself, looking to see if he could find it.

Finally, he saw it, and well…it was a sad looking little creature. He mounted the donkey, and waited for it for move. When it didn't move he tried kicking it a little, before he finally gave up and decided he would just walk. The kingdom shouldn't be too far, right?

**x-x**


End file.
